How to Behave Yourself

The first step in behavior modification

            Living in the fitness industry, I soon came to the realization that everyone is insecure about something. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a physical insecurity.  We as humans can be insecure about any aspect of life, i.e. emotionally insecure, insecure about a physical feature, or even monetarily insecure. Now the question to be answered is: how do we become secure with our insecurities?

            Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. So we start our search for security by identifying the action, not the reaction. Each action (event in our lives) has a series of reactions. When an action occurs we have 4 major mental processes that take place. The first reaction is the initial personal thought in response to the action. Secondly we then emotionally process the action, which then thirdly brings about a physiological response (how your body reacted to the emotional processing). Finally, the fourth reaction is an action of our own, i.e. the equal or opposite reaction.

            To illustrate this process lets use a modern day example and draw it out in a flow-chart. The action is that your friend posts an unflattering photo on social media.

As you can see, each response is interrelated. Yet, when we identify these responses we can begin to find a solution. You can’t find solutions when you don’t know the problem.

            Once we identify the initial action, event, or trigger we can begin to observe and identify our responses. Once we are aware of the problem, we can develop a solution. Much like an addiction recovery program, the first step to recovery is acknowledging you have a problem.

            Where you go from here is up to you. If your behavioral problem is emotional eating, perhaps you eliminate the initial stimulus, in this case social media. If your initial event is that you feel tired after the workday and the response is to skip the gym, hiring a personal trainer to hold you accountable will modify your response.